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Creation Date: 2002-02-12
This picture is DA3 denoting the third of Scene 5's "enemy" models. I'll tell you why I put enemy in quotes in the next paragraph. So we have this picture and you might recognize the mesh. It's actually Shotty Guy's mesh. Shotty Guy is DA1. The lesson I learned tonight is that of hope and axes. The part that deals with hope is contrary to the despair that I felt a while ago. You see, I couldn't figure out what was wrong with this skeleton. Darn you skeleton, work! I tried putting the vertices on the outside of the mesh, then in the middle, then on the inside. It wouldn't do anything right. Well, I decided to try again tonight for this picture. I found that certain joints liked to move certain ways. If I could just move the joints in the ways that it likes and not the ways that it doesn't like, maybe I can make it work. Well, beautiful morning, here we have a decent idea. You usually think of the shoulder being a ball-in-socket joint. That's true to an extent, but have you ever tried doing to your shoulder what 3d ball-in-socket joints do? Here, I'll give you a quote from someone rotating their shoulder around the X-axis, Y-axis, and Z-axis. "Hmm, hmm, uhhn, hmmm, errk, aaaAAAACK!" At this point they either let go of their bicep or they break their arm. Ya, humans don't rotate around all three axes. In fact, doing one at a time is what most people do most of the time. The only people who rotate in two axes at a time for more than a few seconds at a time are kung-fu champs. Thus, we put a limit on model. They only do certain bends. I'm not going to say which bends are correct, but I'll tell you that arms outstretched with palms facing downward is the starting position for all my models. More than that, feel your arms to see what the mesh and the joints actually do. So this picture looks incredible in my opinion. Check out each joint, see the lines there? I dunno how they got there, but they imitate real life and they look anime enough for me. That's a good sign.

I put enemy in quotes because Jav has no enemies. Not in 2002 or 2014. There are people who make mistakes and people who make mistakes. The depravity of humanity makes us all equal in sin. Although I have not physically murdered anyone, I have hurt somebody's feelings before. ^_^ BTW, that's a quote from Ronin, an excellent movie, imho. Anyway, aligning yourself against other people is silliness. Other people can be doing the wrong thing and you know this for sure, but it's not your job to attack, but to help. It is my opinion that every war casualty is a innocent loss. Al Queida troops are innocent as well as my brother is innocent as well as I am innocent. But none of us are innocent. The only way is to stop killing each other. If we have authority enough to murder Afghanistanis then we have the responsibility not to. Jav in 2014 has the conflict that [Scene 5 plot hidden] he is being attacked with obscenely deadly force but has the responsibility not to harm his attackers. Certainly it is impossible to defend without murder? See my sarcasm seething through my words. Does it make sense that saving life requires murder? Makes perfect sense to any infantile reactionary. But not to a pacifist.

I'm doing a bit better today than I was yesterday. I got a bit of food. I got tuna helper but forgot the tuna. Warning to viewers: do not try Tuna Helper without tuna! Yelch. Then I tried to sweeten the taste out of my mouth with Gobstoppers. I nearly busted all my teeth and I ate way too many. The tip of my tongue is numb. But at least I'm not angry.

Well, I started thinking a bit about Evangelion again. I said that I'd add more analysis later and here we are seventy-six or so days later. Part of my reason to talk about Eva again is the wonderful Anime Music Video, "Shinji" by Doishsta. It's in RM and is 3.74 MB and is worth ever bit. It really does well to characterize Shinji's plight. The imagery is just right. Of course, that's half the author of the video and half the author of Evangelion. The action sync is great. Here's some thought about Shinji's terrible problem is his apathy. Certainly if Evangelion did not happen, he'd have a different life, but what would happen? My belief is that he would have much the same experiences and do the same things, but with the absence of the Evangelion. He'd probably run away from his fears (his father, affection, etc), end up having to confront them, screw up, and then figure it all out but not by age fifteen. Perhaps by age twenty-two. That's when most guys like him figure things out.

When I say guys like him, I'm saying that there are guys like him. Myself, I am not very much like Shinji. Apathetic is not my nominal description. But there are plenty of guys out there. And often I find myself in Shinji-esque situations. I would hardly say that he is normal, but the story is not entirely unbelievable. I can relate to Shinji in his situations. Being overwhelmed and feeling powerless in situations that demand reaction rather than apathy. What Shinji should have done is actually irrelevant. Trying to tell Shinji to do something will produce no results. What Misato-san did in the end, helping him, allowed him to expand his own mind to overcome his simple fears (his greatest problem) and deal with the less demanding problems that he faces (saving the world).

I don't think that I explained that very well, but perhaps I'll expand if you e-mail me.
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